So mum was in a rush today and has been all day, she had work so I didn’t see her this morning, she arrived this evening. Mums friend had surprised her by doing all her jobs so we just had time together cuddling and my most favourite part was being fed tea twice!! Mums friend fed me and my mum had arranged someone to drop my feed in too so I didn’t have to wait for her to arrive to be fed.
Mum was telling me about her front door, she has broken it and has had to get it fixed, it cost her lots of money and she was stressing, but I worked my magic and gave her a love to calm her back down. Money comes and goes, me I’m here for another twenty years yet mum, just sniff my mane and inhale the good things in your life.
Although we didn’t get much time together today, mum tells me that we are going to have to work tomorrow cause I’ve had two teas tonight, not sure I like the sound of that!
Love Kia. X.
This is my stable, like everything else in my life, mum gives me the best she can, today she was working late so asked someone else to get me in before she finished work so I wasn’t standing around alone and cold, so she made my bedroom ready for me for when I came in, that red bucket is my tea so I didn’t have to wait, cause like mum, patience isn’t our strongest virtue.
We had our morning cuddles and whilst she was turning me out, she was telling me how proud she is of me, she tells me everyday I’m her princess and I am wasted with her, especially when she has her bad days, she gets mad with herself cause she trusts me with her life and she tells me that too. I don’t mind mum, I love you just the way you are, even on the bad days, and guess what I trust you right back cause I know you give me your best everyday.
Right off to sleep now, this bed isn’t going to muck up itself.
Love Kia. X.
Yesterday mum was so brave, she has suffered a loss of self confidence in herself for so long when it comes to handling, riding and being around other horses and even sadly to say, me at times.
Yesterday she had no choice but to put out my field mate in the field with me, she has known this horse for a year now and although we all can have our fresh moments, she isn’t a bit of trouble most of the time but she does have her moments. Mum was scared to death I know, I felt it through my lead rope but I gave her a nudge as if to tell her she would be okay.
Mum did it and had no issues doing it, my field mate behaved impeccably for her. So whilst mum was still on a high, she booked the indoor arena for later on that day, she was going to ride me. It’s been a while since she last did however I always look after her even when she is shaking wth fear, I look after her.
Mum looked after me too yesterday, she got her friend to put a pole on the floor so we could walk over it. It’s been about two years since we last did this and I suffered a loss of self confidence, I had to have my mum’s friend walk with me the first time and I felt my mum giving me the encouragement and strength to go forward, we did it, we both flew, by the end we were both trotting around over the scary pole on the floor and having the time of our lives. We saved each other today, today was the best day. I made mum proud and I’m proud of mum too. I’ll sleep happily in my stable tonight dreaming of us crossing another bridge together.
Love Kia. X.
So mom was happier yesterday than the day before, she had her nails done, though I don’t know why, cause she only gets dirt under them whenever I come in from the field and she is grooming me. We had our daily hugs but no tears fell today, I hope she is feeling better.
I stood and munched my hay quietly whilst she whittered away about her day, how her friends had recommended a dating site to get back out there and give someone a chance but I see that she isn’t quite ready for that yet. She is still struggling but today is a happy struggle, she sang (quite loudly and badly) I didn’t understand the words but she was laughing when she was singing so I grooved along right with her.
My mum is so funny, she laughs at all the wrong times when she is meant to be serious, like when we are dancing our dressage moves, though I think she just takes too much rescue remedy myself. She laughs when I roll in the field after she spent hours grooming me and bathing me, she laughs when I do my head over the door dance, it’s the most beautiful thing I hear, mum tells me that she loves my neigh so together lets just neigh and laugh mum, things are going to be just fine. I think I’m doing it, I think I’m saving her slowly.
Love Kia. X.
So yesterday mom was a little sad, tried as I might, I couldn’t get her to break free from the demons she holds inside, she smiles and pretends to be a happy little soul but when it’s just me and her in the stable, I know she isn’t, she buries her face in my mane and inhales my smell, she hugs me so tight and I just stand, willing her to feel the love I have for her, after all she is my bringer of hay, my feed lady, my shoe payer, my personal maid and my everything.
I wish mum knew that she was enough, the battles she faces are etched in the sadness in her eyes, I’m sure others don’t notice but I do, you see I was the same, years ago, almost dead in the eye but my mum, she made them shine bright again. I want to be able to save her like she saved me, maybe I already am.
I make her laugh when I do my head over the door dance, she loves to hear me call just for her when she arrives at the yard. I wish I could be with her all the time so she doesn’t feel the loneliness anymore, and as for the person who did this to her, I’d like to double barrel their backside right across this yard, how dare they break down my beautiful mum, and stand by and watch as she shatters without caring one jot and carrying on as normally as before.
One day I’ll make her believe she was good enough and she is worth it. But for now I’ll just stand and give her my love whilst she cries her tears in my mane.
So excited, who knew horses could whisper or even blog, well apart from me of course. This isn’t the usual type of horsey, life or family blog you’d expect, don’t follow me for advice or expect any, after all I’m just a horse.
I listen to my owners whispers and just put them here, where I won’t forget them, you never know, she might test me on them like those endless dressage tests we practice, I think it’s like dancing however I like to do it at racehorse speed rather than the refined Carl Hester type mum seems to prefer but anyway I digress.
You won’t find one practical bit of advice here I can assure you of that, we might find humour, pain, sweat, hard work, recovery, therapy, a few tears and most definitely a few stray hairs, it is after all hair shedding season or spring as it’s known elsewhere.
So please bear with me, you do know how hard it is to type with hooves right?!? I promise the best is yet to come and maybe one day, mum will get brave and write a whisper blog herself, but for now it’s just me.
Love Kia. X